Doomeastvan – ‘Tis We


If you guessed, judging by their name, that Doomeastvan was a Vancouver doom-metal band… well, you’d only be half-right. The artwork on this album screams 90s death metal, while their song titles and stage names (ie. Cazbo Low Rifferson, 333 Thee Half Beast) would make Oderus Urungus proud.

I guess you could call opening track “Humans are Bad” death-doom, complete with guttural death-metal vocals that make Coffins’ Bungo Uchino sound like Joey Belladonna. But what follows is strictly death metal—albeit with nursery-rhyme lyrics. That’s right, Track 2 is actually called “Buckle My Shoe.” It even has a chugga-chugga breakdown to the tune of “Hot Cross Buns.” Oi, they takin’ the piss?

The next song actually starts off with tuba and a seemingly unskilled horn section… then continues on for 13 minutes of drone, beeps and boops and whispers. I no longer know what to think at this point, but, y’know, it sorta reminds me of Sunn O)))))))))))).

From there, we get more crunchy death-doom, screeching feedback, fast-food drive-thru orders(!) and the occasional jazzy tuba interlude. Quick, somebody get these guys on a bill with GWAR before it’s… oh wait, nevermind.

Seahawks/Stamps/Flames/Zags/Jays/Raptors fan and lifelong metal head with a beer gut and a self-deprecating sense of humour. Reviewer/blogger (Yon Senior Doomsayer) for

6.0 Rating